Surface
to air
Contact
wounds
Amassing
in clots,
Clustered
epoxy,
Seeping,
from flesh to soul
A
revelation amongst balderdash
Revealing
the jakes of war-
Chariots
afire, travail the thieving scape
While
asphalt and cumulus collide in view then break
…and
the visions continue
Watercolors
and botanicals
Both
angles bountiful
Yet
inhospitable,
to
those who never spoke their tongue
Limbs.
Torsos. Sternums. Tibias. Fibulas. Ulnas. Radii
Huddled
jigsaws. Amassing carts.
Victor
would have a field day in such anarchy of body
This
world is inhabitable.
Air
is filled with musket fodder
Water
contaminated by what keeps us living
The
truth materializes within each image
Pituitary
cloaks, in division
Possibility,
leashed by feral strands
And
bounties clipped upon…
Things
no man was meant to see.
Another Tuesday has made it's way. Another Open Link Night is itching to play. 3 pm the links will appear. All poets will chant their cheer. Another Pint, Another Poem, Tuesday Night, D'verse owns. So yes, please join everyone over at D'Verse, for their weekly Open Link Night, where you can submit your offering while enjoying those shared by others. So hope to see you all there, starting at 3pm.
no, no man should see...vivid and intense the spilled jigsaw puzzles of bodies that war creates...and for what purpose...
ReplyDeleteThings no man was meant to see... there are way too many battlefields on this earth..i so wish we would manage to make this world a better place to feel at home again...but maybe there's still a chance..
ReplyDeleteBody parts as jigsaw puzzles, now there is an image. You really through away the muzzle with this one and went to the dark side. Tearing limb from limb, those who are quite dim, causing the things no man was meant to see, by simply being pig headed and/or greedy.
ReplyDelete*shivers* A reminder of how horrendous war is...'Things no man was meant to see' ..A powerful write that packs a punch..
ReplyDeleteTrench warfare during WW1 was dreadful for those who had to suffer for weeks and sometimes months on end to win a few yards of blood soaked mud but, any warfare is also dreadful.
ReplyDeleteYour piece evokes it all in vivid detail.
Very in your face. I like your writing as it really brings you there... lovely. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comments, really appreciate them all. Don't know why but I woke up from the dream/nightmare with this horrible image of a battlefield, Daydreamer must have been in my dream as I believe the image was of WWI. Bodies strewn everywhere. Well I tried to equate that to much of the atrocities that are going on now, needn't be in "war" but just how Claudia mentioned, there are way too many battlefields, and way, way too many victims, which unfortunately, many of which, are children, who gain their first real tangible memories blanketed in horror, and many of which don't have any other point of reference. i was going to include a line at the end there. But the walking dead still march...cause they gotta get up, gotta get up, gotta get up in the morning- but felt it, although a reference to a WWII popular song, might change the tone a bit-so I edited it out.
ReplyDeleteAnyhow, glad you enjoyed the piece and thanks again. Really appreciate it all:)
sounds like a scene, that is the atmosphere in a drawing/painting studio.
ReplyDeleteVery timely poem, Fred, that speaks important truths about the reality of war. It seems that, by now, we should have thought up a new way to settle differences, but that is not how it is. I also see your poem as metaphorical for the wars that go on inside our own psyches.
ReplyDeleteI've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I've watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those ... moments will be lost in time, like tears...in rain.
ReplyDeleteTime to die.
you made me think of this quote Fred - its one of the best qoutes ever - so your poem rocks!
I love what you do - coz you do you
nice work brother
I should explain the qoute was inspired by the poem combined with the backdrop - awesome work bro
ReplyDeletethe essence of violence, disturbingly well expressed here - an unsettling, but well-crafted piece...
ReplyDelete"asphalt and cumulus collide in view then break" -I like how that line is so musical, yet that beauty is contradicted by the horrifying image it describes. I hope to never see such sights.
ReplyDeleteall the battlefields, heartbreaking.
ReplyDeletethings no man should ever see. i often wonder how soldiers survive, once they come back to what must seem like a very trite world indeed.
'are children, who gain their first real tangible memories blanketed in horror, and many of which don't have any other point of reference.' Breaks my heart how children are the first victims of war (I don't really see 18 as adult when it comes to slaughter either).
ReplyDeleteWow, this poem is incredible, I am gaining a deep respect for your writing. Thank you.
Make sure you read Chris G's poem, Fred--he also wrote about WWI. This was horribly real all through--I think the realest poetry we write comes from dreams. For some reason that second stanza just rings for me, but there are some unusual and very effective combinations all through this. Excellent and chilling. (And thanks for your kind words about our Open Link Night.)
ReplyDeleteA powerful and moving anti-war poem. Crafted with just the right touch-- such a poem can be too graphic, I think. xxxj
ReplyDeleteHarrowing Fred, vivid, visceral, but more a finely written piece..when will we as a species evolve away from destruction? hmm powerful...thank you for creating!
ReplyDeleteA picture of a battlefield, the narrator appears one who has been in fight for sometime and laments the unlivable state his world has become.
ReplyDelete"This world is inhabitable.
Air is filled with musket fodder
Water contaminated by what keeps us living"
This stands out for me. The basic things needed for life in a very bad state. We know that without air or water, one is not going to be alive for very long nad yet here they are ruined and this was caused probably for survival -- an oddness that only makes sense in war perhaps. One gets the feeling that one can't breath and there's a horrible need for clear water suddenly. That which is sustaining the narrator on the battlefield is killing all the world it seems.
Zongrik Thanks, I like that take- very interesting to think about
ReplyDeleteVictoria- yeah, seems like we, the intelligent beings we are, should have come up with better ways by now. Love your take at the end there as well-very interesting, will have to ponder
Arron- that is a pretty awesome quote, honored my piece conjured it up for you- really glad you enjoyed the piece- Thanks, appreciate it
Rob- thanks, I appreciate that
Mark- appreciate that, Thanks for the feedback
Mrs. Mediocrity, I know a few guys back from their stints over in Afghanistan and Iraq and it's a wonder it really is- I couldn't have dealt with it, actually I know someone that has a bit of difficulty at night- the world has to be filtered differently for returning soldiers, it has to. Thanks for the feedback, really appreciate it
Anna- Oh, I completely agree, innocence doesn't have an age requirement. Really flattered you're enjoying my work- Big time compliment in my book- thanks again:)
Hedge- thanks I did read his, it's very good. Glad you enjoyed the piece, and your welcome for the comment over at D'verse-love what you've all put together over there
Jen- thanks glad you enjoyed it- glad to hear it wasn't all too graphic- as I've been known to get a bit over-the top in some of my imagery in certain styles of poetry I do. Thanks I appreciate the feedback
Kerryann- Glad to see the gatekeepers at Blogger have finally let you in- I'm really happy to see that:) Thanks really happy you enjoyed the poem, love the V words- one of the best, if not most under-appreciated letters in the alphabet in my opinion. Yeah, when will we evolve? great question. Thanks again, always appreciate the feedback
Raven- great interpretation-seems like you've got a real knack for interpreting my work- I always look forward to your feedback. Yeah I was told at one point that if you want to incite fear in an audience, either through writing for the page or for the screen, you start by "threatening" the most basic of needs in your characters, as the audience will vicariously experience a semblance of what those characters are going through- so wonderful interpretation. Thanks again, always appreciate your comments:)
intense and what more can I say than what everyone else has already mentioned. stellar and epic imagery here, Fred.
ReplyDeletesuch a great poem and yes there are some things that not only man but woman and all should not see well expressed
ReplyDeletehttp://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/11/the-day-of-the-dead/#comment-1682
Thanks Ann, I appreciate the feedback- yes I agree- just as a side note, when I write man I'm referring to mankind as a whole, but yeah some things are just not meant to be seen. Thanks again, glad you liked the poem
ReplyDelete