Saturday, November 12, 2011

When Pigs Fly

Well, after composing, You're Such An Idiom, I really didn't have any intention of venturing back down that path anytime soon.  But, after reading the D'Verse Poetics prompt tonight, I had to jump back aboard the idiomatic train.  Idiom's are fun because they are everyday phrases and so forth, and to be quite honest, there's a lot to laugh at, when looking back upon some of the things we say as a matter of commonplace.

I liked the angle D'Verse took with this prompt.  Have fun with it.  How could you go wrong with that?  Well, I really don't know, but perhaps after reading this attempt at humor, you'll let me know:)


When Pigs Fly,
I would guess,
The bigger they are—
Then truly the harder they’d fall,

And I surmise,
The effects would linger,
Til the cows came home

But even if,
I would think,
That it would take one,
With Zoological aspirations
To prevent this oddity from risk of fester,

And so, he who raises hand,
In an obvious attempt of brownosery,
Would soon be upwind,
from where the necessary knowledge laid

Before long it would become too late,
As often, upon inhalation,
These pig-in-a –pokes,
Have the tendency,
To cloud one’s sense of self.

He who cannot smell a rat, often,
Mismanages their scent of track,

Typically, the endosmotically leaked vapor-age,
Fray grunts, as they cling upon collar tight,

Surprisingly, or not, it is precisely, this—
loss for words—created by a poor-piss-full
dissed-splay, therein, in-tension stirs,
as it often does, when one is lacking breath,
this melodious adieu lead to a certain rarity,
that being a pungency of track-shun

Now, I ask you: Why, should one bad apple,
Sour the appetites of an entire table at five?


  1. Ha, this is awesome. You so cleverly weave many idioms here. I really like the lines:

    "That it would take one,
    With Zoological aspirations
    To prevent this oddity from risk of fester,"

    And that second to last stanza has some fantastic word play going on. Great write!

  2. ooo upwind of pigs falling...i am afraid the cows might not come home for piss you have not spoiled it...i am chuckling...

  3. Wow who knew pigs flying could be so complicated..haha.. I hope they never get the notion to take flight or the situation could be dire, great idiom fun.

  4. i like how you wove the different idioms together

  5. Thanks for the laugh, though I got a bit lost there at the end (not always a bad thing, like being spun around for a pinata). I loved 'zoological aspirations', 'brownosery', and 'endosmotically'.

  6. very entertaining! especially enjoyed the first two stanzas about the pigs and cows :P

  7. Very clever! I liked the ending particularly. Why indeed? (Beginning too actually--the hard falling flying pigs.) K.

  8. Fun. Glad you gave it another spin. ;)

  9. smiles..much enjoyed...going to take an umbrella with me when i leave the house case there come some heavy pigs flying..and be sure..i've smelled the play with the idioms fred..i like

  10. Gosh,Fred! There's a whole load of idioms here to keep company. I was trying to figure out which is which. But it flowed too smoothly, I just couldn't. Great verse!


  11. A creative write, and my mind just flew along with the pigs, no not with the rats. Thanks for sharing this and happy sunday ~